What does intimacy look like for singles? You deeply care for one another and want to express it, but don’t want to cross what may feel like blurry lines. God has a lot to say on the matter. In this article we’ll dig into what the Bible teaches about this extremely important subject.
August 12, 2020
It’s been a long day. The children are finally in bed. You reflect on the chaos of the day, which was not much different than the norm—an early morning with your toddler waking up screaming for no apparent reason, bickering siblings, a teenager with a bad attitude, messes in every room, mouths to feed, dishes piled high in the sink, laundry still in the washer from the day before, feelings of inadequacy plaguing your heart. Intermingled throughout the day were your outbursts of anger and stress-filled sighs.
You sit down in exhaustion and start tapping through Instagram stories… Joanna Gaines with her pleasant smile introducing you to gorgeous décor and picture-perfect rooms. Tap. Two stunning women taking a selfie together. Tap. A mom on a carefree outing with her children. Tap. Siblings playing peacefully together. Tap. A friend with the perfect figure demonstrating her workout routine. Tap. A delicious-looking, healthy meal served on the prettiest plates with a flawless table layout. Tap. A husband and wife on a romantic date… Depressing thoughts start to swirl. Not one aspect of your life looks like any of those images.
Then you make the best decision of your day and open up your Bible. Here is where you find your comfort. Here is where you find your joy. Here is where you find reminders of an unfailing love. Here is where you find the strength to face another day. And here is where you find the truths that will fill you with perseverance to stay the course of motherhood, despite the daily challenges you face.
We see God’s Word favorably reflecting on the godly woman who works diligently within her home: “She watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness” (Proverbs 31:27). We are given a picture of a woman who is focused, intentional, and faithful. And what a privilege it is to be the queen of the castle; to be the one who brings comfort and blessings to our loved ones in a way that is so often glossed over. How beautiful it is to make a home a refuge from the storms of life, a place to retreat to that is warm, inviting, clean, and organized; where love and care has been taken in preparing food, in washing clothes, in mopping floors. We may feel inadequate as to how well we run our homes, especially in seasons with little ones, but the heart behind it all is what really counts. It is not about perfection. It’s about loving our families through serving with all of our hearts. It’s about washing that dish, folding those clothes, scrubbing a toilet, cooking that meal—for the millionth time—to the glory of God, and out of the depths of love that we have for our precious ones.
In the Psalms, we are told of the blessing of children: “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a reward” (Psalm 127:3). There are tough days where we might struggle to see our children as some kind of reward. Yet those hard days do not change the fact that children are treasures from the hand of God. As we meditate on the gift of life, as we experience the joy that our children bring into our home and the absolute wonder of watching them grow, how can we not marvel and worship the God who gave us these marvelous blessings? We should be stirred to cherish every moment we have with them, soaking up the memories, training them in the ways of the Lord and pouring His Word into their hearts.
We are also reminded that God is in control of every aspect of our lives, and that He will daily be our help: “The Lord sat enthroned at the Flood, and the Lord sits as King forever. The Lord will give strength to His people; the Lord will bless His people with peace” (Psalm 29:10-11). When God places the responsibility of motherhood on our shoulders, we can feel a calmness within our souls with the knowledge that He is sovereign. He has been on His throne since before time began, and He is still on that throne. He made you the mother of your children and He doesn’t make mistakes. He will give you strength as you seek Him and fill your heart and mind with His Word. And an eternal mindset will enable you to experience His peace even in the midst of the most chaotic of days.
God’s abundant love flies off the pages of Scripture at us. We see His unconditional and everlasting love for us manifested on the cross: “But God demonstrated His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). We must remind ourselves of His love on a daily basis. Satan would love for us to allow our circumstances to question that love, but those who recognize the gravity of their sin against a holy God will never doubt the love that the cross reveals. On those difficult days, when our hearts are sad and loneliness is often a reality, we can smile because we know that we are loved beyond measure by the Creator of the universe!
As you serve sacrificially in your home every day, don’t ever forget that no matter what you may feel at times, you are involved in a magnificent ministry for the Lord. His sufficient grace will meet you at every turn, and His daily mercies will carry you through a new day after the discouragement of yesterday’s failure. When you daily strive to show the love of Christ to your loved ones and lead your children in God’s ways, you are doing the most beautiful work that can be done on this earth. You are impacting and shaping the most impressionable among us and readying them to face a challenging world. God is with you in the daily battle, and He will sustain you as you seek first His kingdom.