My heart pounds as I write. My stomach is churning. I had an abortion in about 1974. I was married and my husband and I were trying for a baby. I got pregnant and was very happy. I told my husband at dinner. He got mad and said he would leave if I had the baby. I had a two year old son at the time by a previous marriage. I called my mother and told her my husband wanted me to have an abortion or he was leaving. She actually told me an abortion would probably be best. The one I thought I could trust to stand by me, my own mother counseled me to abort my baby!! I wanted that baby so bad! My husband talked me into abortion. I waited as long as I could to make the appointment. The last time I called, the abortion clinic said I would have to make my decision soon, or it would be too late. I wanted it to be too late! But I got scared, and made the appointment. The actual appointment was a nightmare!! They told me that it was just a blob of blood, not even a formed baby yet. That was a total lie! I put on a gown, and they put me on a table in stirrups. I was left in those stirrups for a long time. I was crying so hard! When the doctor and nurses came it, I told them I didn’t want to do it! I said NO! The doctor said to think good thoughts or you’ll have nightmares under the anesthesia. I said NO, and they put the needle in me and put me out!!!!! I indeed had a nightmare! I dreamt I was on a conveyer belt going through a tunnel of uterine materials. That’s the only way I can describe it. It was all around me, swirling, thick tissue. I was terrified! When I woke up, I was crying my eyes out. I held my stomach and kept saying, My baby! My baby! I thought frantically that maybe I hadn’t had the abortion yet, that maybe I still had a chance…maybe the baby was still safe inside me. A nurse came over (I was in the recovery room with several other women) and said, I know….I know…It’s alright… My husband picked me up and took me home. I hated him! His first words were, We can have another baby. I had nightmares every night, I was depressed… I kept waking up, hearing a baby cry. I would sit up with the hope that it was all a nightmare and my baby was crying for me. My husband got sick of my depression and longing for my baby. I got pregnant about 1 1/2 years later. My husband said the same thing to me… Get an abortion! I don’t want a baby! I ran for my baby’s life!! I moved in with my mother out of town. She wasn’t sympathetic, but I didn’t care! I just wanted a place to go where I could have my baby! I had a beautiful little girl. I left my husband, but he fell in love with that little girl. She now has a 2 yr. old and another one on the way. My youngest daughter got pregnant with her 3rd child and she called from out of state to tell me she was going to have an abortion. I sent her Pro-life info and pictures. She was insistent that she was having an abortion as soon as she got the $100. I prayed to God that she wouldn’t get the money. I called her several times….even in the middle of the night to plead with her to at least have the baby and give her up for adoption. After viewing the materials I sent her, she decided to have the baby. I became the grandmother/guardian of that baby the day she was born. She is now 5 years old! Such a beauty! One of my other daughters ended up pregnant too. It just happened to be about the time I fell apart from my previous abortion. I was reading the abortion materials and had the pictures, and ended up joining a recovery group from the local Crisis Pregnancy Center. I saw my daughter pick up the materials and take them to her room. She read them and told me she was pregnant and that she decided to have her baby. She is now married to the father. Their daughter is now 8 years old. They are planning their second baby! I am blessed with 6 grandchildren currently. I’ll never forget the nightmare. I went to the abortion clinic that took my baby when Crisis Pregnancy Center had a candlelight vigil. We were actually on the news! I held pictures of an aborted baby, which said, Abortion hurts women. The news showed the writing, but not the picture…. I’m not afraid to tell of my abortion. It has saved some babies, though I lost one girl, who ended up aborting. I’ll always take a stand in defense of the unborn, and against the bloody slaughter of generations of children! When one baby is aborted, it’s not just one life lost, but their children and their children’s children….entire generations die in each baby killed. Thanks for listening. I know it was long….